Are We As Happy As We Seem On Social Networks?

Today I feel good looking in the mirror, but I don’t have to take a picture of myself for others to see. I took to the streets and gave a smile to the person who walked by, but I don’t have to post that on a social network to get “likes”. Smiles are enough for me.

We are all amazed at how far people are going on social networks, these new means of communication. They expose their lives, their thoughts and their daily activities on social networks, opening the curtain of their minds and revealing their own fears and mistakes.

First of all, it must be said that the new technology and social networks are wonderful developments that have enriched our lives. They unite people, shorten distances and even worlds, and they give us better access to new knowledge. However, everything has a specific application and a specific purpose.

What motivates people to publish their thoughts every second or post selfies every few hours?

I want your attention, I want instant satisfaction

With the advent of social networks, a new interactive platform has opened up, in which it is not necessary to leave your home to talk, share, seduce or exchange information with friends.

Now there is a scary sense of urgency. No need to go outside or catch the bus. You can fix yourself up, put on a better smile and take a photo that can be instantly published on social networks.

And the reward comes right away. Dozens, hundreds of ‘likes’ and ‘favorites’ appear within seconds. And that’s great for people who need stimulation, instant recognition and positive reinforcement, which are really short and fleeting.

So they repeat it over and over, for hours on end, because getting this kind of reinforcement is kind of like an addiction. And because there will always be someone who will give them attention for a second, even if they don’t even know all the people who like them.

Sharing mistakes, emptiness and needs

“I feel alone, this person has let me down, I’m having a bad day, this world is not worth living, this person is selfish, no one understands me…”

You may have found this kind of status on social networks several times. If they’re your friends and you appreciate them, you wouldn’t hesitate to pick up the phone or visit them to find out what happened and help them.

However, these posts are public outbursts. Instead of getting some fresh air or just being in silence for a moment, they prefer to put it on these networks, which are visible to all eyes.

If you don’t know the person, you may wonder how he is doing a few days later, but in reality, these feelings never get resolved.

They prefer to emotionally leave  their discomforts, their outbursts of anger, their comments or their sadness on public platforms such as social networks.

I show something I’m not to make me feel better

Have you ever come across a fake profile? Have you been in a friendship or relationship with someone who wasn’t who they said they were? There are many people who show virtues they actually don’t have, fantastic stories accompanied by misleading photos.

Sometimes we can see the behavior of certain friends on our social networks, when they talk about things they haven’t done or show a distorted view of themselves.

For many people, social networks are protective shields that allow them to stay within their comfort zone, hiding their fears and insecurities, while showing them something they want to be or have. You don’t even have to leave the house to find a partner. You don’t have to go to certain events to befriend people with similar tastes.

The world is just a click away from us and this is without a doubt a beautiful thing, but it can also be dangerous, depending on the person.

Balance

The balance lies in enjoying life intensely, in making use of every situation, but also in giving priority to the senses: sight, touch, smell, taste…

No face is more seductive than one standing right in front of us, no hug is warmer than one you know needs to be given, and no conversation is deeper than one that starts with a cup of coffee.

Social networks are great for sharing specific things, communicating with people who are far away from us, laughing, learning and exploring, but you should always respect your own privacy. Look for intimacy that isn’t based on  likes .

You don’t have to share a photo on social networks so that other people recognize your happiness or sadness. Each of us should know how to read our own grief and enjoy our happiness without needing an audience. We need to know where to draw the line between the public sphere and private life.

–Images courtesy of Pascal Campion–