Why Do We Stay In An Unhappy Relationship?
Relationships involve more than giving each other a box of chocolates on Valentine’s Day or doing lots of little things. A healthy, happy relationship can make you a better person, a happy and healthy person. To achieve this you need good communication, respect and good habits as a person.
If communication, respect and good habits do not exist, an unhappy relationship develops. Unfortunately, many people remain in these unhappy relationships because they have fallen into the following patterns:
Don’t pay attention to your intuition
Has the little voice in your head been telling you for a while that your partner is not what he seems?
It often happens that at the beginning of a relationship everything seems great. This is part of the crush that brings us closer to that person. We usually don’t look at their faults and only see their good qualities.
The problem starts when some unhealthy behaviors come up or we start seeing them; behaviors such as lying, strange behavior or excessive jealousy.
If you find yourself in this situation, don’t just keep pushing it away when you think about it or else you’ll end up in such a bad relationship that no one wants to be in.
Analyze the situation and if you think the relationship is starting to get unhealthy, think carefully about whether you want to stay in that situation. Sometimes you can ask for outside help and in some cases it is better to end the relationship to avoid more serious problems.
Fear of life in a relationship
If your family is like mine, they’ll want to know when you’re getting married. They will worry if you are single, no matter what your life goals are. It’s something that happens often and you should learn to deal with it instead of worrying about it.
Many unhappy relationships are created because of this. Both men and women can be tempted to get into a relationship to avoid asking too many questions.
When we are in a relationship, they start to pressure us about marriage. We eventually get married and after a while we find ourselves in a relationship that we don’t really want.
The best thing you can do is not worry about outside pressure. If you’re not ready now, just explain it to whoever is asking the questions. Each of us lives at our own pace and we must respect this.
Fear of leaving the comfort zone
This behavior may be related to the previous one, but it doesn’t necessarily have to go together. Many people just stay in a relationship because they are comfortable with how the situation is now, even if there is no love left.
Maybe you care about your partner but you don’t love him/her or there are things you can’t stand but accept because it’s “easier” than dealing with the social pressures.
It may also be that there is no outside pressure. Perhaps your biggest dream is to get married and have children so that you have a stable family. So you start looking for a person who wants about the same thing. There is a good chance that that person will not meet all your expectations, but because he/she wants to give you what you want, you accept that.
As you can imagine, you are faced with an unhappy relationship in both cases. In the beginning it can go well, but after a few years there are too many problems.
How can you change this behavior?
We all have intuition, even if we don’t always pay attention to it. But paying attention to this intuition is the best way to avoid ending up in an unhappy relationship. You have to listen to what your feelings are telling you.
We always try to avoid pain and suffering. This is very normal. This allows us to do two things with an unhappy relationship: break up or convince ourselves that everything is okay. To stay healthy, the best thing we can do is end the relationship.
It won’t be easy, but you take control of your life and you can look for a relationship that makes you feel good.
–Images courtesy of Nicoletta Ceccoli, Claudia Tremblay, Melissa Copeland–
