Learning To Lose – One Of The Most Important Lessons In Life

Do you always let your child win? Even if you think this is the right way, letting him win gives him a false sense of success. Your child may have already noticed this and told you more than once, ‘Daddy! Don’t let me win, play for real!’. I’m sure you were stunned when he told you that the first time. But he wants the real challenge you’re trying to avoid. Learning to lose is part of life.

It may seem a bit silly. But the truth is that with this attitude you are holding your child back from growing. You prevent him from growing up and discovering that sometimes he will succeed but other times he will not. For that reason, it is very important that children learn to lose at a young age. We can’t always win. Knowing how to accept both results will be very valuable in the future.

Do you let your child win because you are afraid he will feel bad?

In most cases, you are undoubtedly letting your child win because you are afraid that his confidence will drop. You think he will feel bad. You fear he will be left with scars from those successive defeats. But all you do is stop him from going through the wonderful experience of learning how to lose. He can also learn how to improve and cope with his loss so that he can win.

“You have to know how to lose.”  This sentence is all too true. When you put it into practice, it gives you the chance to overcome obstacles, conflicts and problems. Because they always show up when you least expect them. But none of this will be possible if you let your child win continuously. For he will lose if you always pretend to lose, when he could not have defeated you in any way. How can you deal with the feeling of always being bad when you win every game?

Giving your child the advantage

This is one way to do it right. Give your child an advantage. This way you ensure that you are on the same level as him. You can also take into account the difficulty of the game. Because for some games children are still too young. In these types of games, it is a good idea to play in a team. By playing together, you can take on a kind of supporting role that helps him learn.

If your child experiences what it’s like to lose, you have a great opportunity to teach him how to handle defeat. For example, you can show him that it is much more important to enjoy the moment than to focus so much on the end result. That way, the ending isn’t the determining factor. You have then taught your child to focus on how he feels throughout the experience.

Learning to lose and why it matters

It is very important for your child to experience what it is like to lose his battles. Let him learn how to handle defeats with integrity and not to collapse when they occur. That way he also learns not to get angry with others. He will be able to recognize the effort and victory of others. In these defeats, we often learn a lot about how to do better next time.

Learning to lose will enable your child to not view failure as a door that suddenly closes. But he will see that it is really an opportunity to improve, mature and grow in those areas of his life that still need to be developed. He will also be able to tolerate frustration much more easily. Instead of being put down by opponents or enemies, he now learns how to use defeat to his advantage. He will come out stronger.

The child will no doubt see that in defeat he bears some of the responsibility for what happens. This is also the case when real life does not live up to its expectations. It will be a chance not to put the blame on others. He will also see that there is no such thing as bad luck or luck in the outcome. In this way, he will view his mistakes as an opportunity to do things right. He will see it as an opportunity to change or as an opportunity to correct something that he did not do well.

Losing is a great experience

If you let your child win, you prevent him from enjoying the wonderful experience of losing. It may sound negative at first, but it is very necessary. Because sooner or later you will have to deal with difficulties that you have to solve. If you haven’t learned how to lose then how can you expect to act with integrity and maturity? How, then, will you know how to resist defeat in matters far more important than a simple game?

Win or lose, you always learn something. The important thing is the road we take and know how to enjoy everything along the way. For therein lies the real source of all learning. So don’t be alarmed if your child feels bad because he lost a game. After all, it’s just a game. Your child will get over this in no time. If he learns to accept the result in a sporty way, whatever it is, then you lay a very strong and powerful foundation. It will enable your child to overcome any hurdle in the future.

Featured image courtesy of Pascal Campion