What Can You Do When Your Emotions Take Over?

When you notice that your emotions are taking over, stop and take a deep breath. We’ve all experienced that feeling at one time or another. It occurs in the middle of a discussion or when fear takes over.

These emotional kidnappings are devastating. However, we always have tools at our disposal that can help us stay in control.

We may know this kind of situation all too well. Some people are more vulnerable to emotional overload. However, others may fall back on their strong self-control. They succeed in that self-control because they can direct any of these “emotional threats.” Usually neither strategy produces the best results.

Overwhelming emotions

The imprint of these complex worlds will remain on the surface. It will rob us of peace and balance. We always see patients coming to the consultations blaming their shortcomings.

They say things like “My terrible fear is the problem,” I don’t know what to do with my anger” or “I have problems with my emotions. I don’t know what to do to live a normal life.”

These kinds of statements show us once again that there is a prejudice in our society about these issues. We keep thinking that emotions are bad and that feeling fear is useless.

We also think that a life without the shadow of fear would be a life with more meaning. What we often forget, however, is that these emotions always have a clear purpose in function of our survival and adaptation.

Knowing, accepting and managing your emotions much better will help you avoid these recurring emotional floods.

Look to the horizon when your emotions take control

At some point, when emotions begin to overflow, look to the horizon. Try to stay present in that moment for a moment. Leave the world as it is. Let any discussion run its course. You then allow all those frightening stimuli to become frozen in time. They are trapped in a harmless dimension.

Set your gaze on that imaginary line of rest. Do this so that you allow your mind and body a few seconds to regulate your breathing and heart rate. It will also help you manage the tension you are experiencing.

When chaos takes over your life, the best thing you can do is stay calm. We humans sometimes experience emotional flooding. Panic then takes over our brains. This sounds logical. After all, it is the most instinctive part of our brain.

In these moments everything is chaotic, messy and intense. In these situations, the prefrontal cortex is ‘disengaged’. This part of the brain is responsible for analytical skills, decision making and logical reasoning. We will now look at how this complicated process works.

The Amygdala and the Direct Trip to Fear and Anger

When emotions start to take over, we can go from calm to panic, anger or fear in just five seconds. How is that possible? What mechanism within us is able to take control so quickly?

We have all asked ourselves this question at some point in our lives. The answer is as fascinating as it is disturbing. The amygdala is responsible for all of this.

A study has been conducted on this at Emory University in Atlanta. It was published in the  Journal of Biological Psychiatry. This study has revealed that the amygdala controls all our fears, stress or behaviors related to aggression.

For example, the study has shown that this small brain structure is responsible for collecting the information from our environment that is connected to the threats around us. The amygdala also makes us respond. The goal is very specific: to survive.

Uncontrolled emotions overflowing

In people who develop emotional disorders, one characteristic is very specific. They cannot or do not regulate their emotions properly. Over time, this situation creates even more fear in them. They start to feel helpless. In addition, they feel that everything around them is out of their control.

So we need to be clear here. The emotions we don’t regulate today will overwhelm us tomorrow. If this situation becomes chronic, conditions such as generalized anxiety disorder and depression can emerge.

We must also realize that in these situations it is pointless to suppress emotions or block thoughts. The classic idea “I’m just not going to think about it” doesn’t help us at all. In fact, it can create even more blockages and problems in the short and long term.

What can you do when emotions take over?

What strategy should we use when emotions take over? In psychological contexts we often use the words ’emotional control’. Rather than ‘control’, it is more accurate that we use the term ‘steering’. After all, the word ‘steering’ allows for more flexibility and dynamism.

Somehow, control is the protagonist here. Think of strength and dominance. In this case and in the emotional context, we must leave out resistance. We must choose acceptance, direction, flexibility, change and movement.

Some strategies that we should apply in these situations:

• A study was published in the journal  Frontiers in Psychology  that stated that emotional control is not the same for everyone. This means that there is no unique strategy that works in every situation and in every circumstance. The fear of having to face a test, a discussion, or a breakup or a loss will cause us to start applying strategies to deal with these situations.
• On the other hand, emotions always have a purpose. We have to ask ourselves what they want from us. What is their intention? That is also the reason that looking to the horizon is always a useful strategy against the state of alarm. Indeed, this will make it possible to enter our mental palace and find ourselves. Once we get there, we have to ask ourselves what is happening and why it is happening.
• We must point out another important factor. The amygdala in the brain is the sentry. In most cases, that sentry decides to mobilize fear and anger before we consciously think about it. He acts by instinct rather than logic. When he does this, he takes control of our bodies. It induces all the symptoms we are so familiar with, such as tachycardia, dizziness and sweating.

Take a deep breath

When emotions take over, it doesn’t help to say to ourselves, “Keep calm, nothing will happen.”  It makes no sense because in reality something is happening in the brain. So at these times the most appropriate approach is to calm the body with deep breaths.

Taking a deep breath and exhaling slowly will help us regulate the heart rate and relieve muscle tension. When the body is in balance, we can deal with our thoughts. We can then take a closer look at how and why we feel this way.